So I bought a Cuddle Clone of my dog, Bubby (real name Aruga) which is basically a stuffed animal to look exactly like your dog. It was really reeeaaally expensive and they paid attention to parts that I pointed out but I assumed it was obvious that they pay attention to her face, you know? Well… They didn’t. So I did some work to make her look more like herself. I felted some and permanent-markered some.
So I shortened the tongue because she never had it hanging out unless she was panting. She was always smiling and when she smiled her tongue wasn’t hanging out. She was actually smiling. It was so sweet.
I wish I didn’t have to fix it but I don’t want to send it back. I just want it now. I feel like I probably still wouldn’t be satisfied if I send it back to be fixed. It’s a really big stuffy which is nice and it’s nicely weighted. It has a zipper on the bottom that I put some of her hair in and I put her collar on it.
I feel kinda cheated but the stuffed animal is really high quality… It’s just I bought this so that I didn’t have to look at and critique my own work? But this was a lot less work than me doing it ALL myself I guess. I think I expected to feel better about it than I do. I think it’s sort of like how food tastes better when someone else makes it. Or maybe I was just expecting to feel like I got my dog back or something. It’s been a year and it hasn’t gotten easier.
Hugs. I know that feeling. I thought I’d feel better when I got a memorial box and ornament for my hedgie boy, Pipkin. Like somehow it’d be cathartic and start my heart healing. Not so much. Every day I wake up missing him and while I love our other hedgies, they aren’t and never will be my boy. He was exceptional and amazing and he left a giant hole in my heart that feels like it won’t ever heal.
But that’s the cost of love and I’d gladly pay it again if I could go back in time.
That sucks that the Cuddle Clone wasn’t what you hoped it would be, but at the same time, you’ve poured your love and effort into making it more like your dog and while you shouldn’t have had to do that, at the same time doesn’t it make the stuffie more yours in a way it never would have been if it had arrived perfect? You have pictures of your pup. Perfect replicas of her. But this stuffie has a bit of you in it now too.
Hugs to you as well! I suppose it all is just part of the grieving process… I’ve never experienced this kind of loss before so I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel I guess? So hearing you felt the same way with a memorial piece is helpful.
I’ve had other dogs but Bubby was special. She was my soulmate. My partner is my soulmate too but she was my child so they’re different types of soulmates, I guess. I knew she was mine the moment I saw her. She was perfect. She knew to trust me immediately even if she was afraid of everyone else. We always trusted each other completely. We just knew each other. We always knew what the other needed.
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AIMR
(Linda -2026 time to regroup and renew :us:)
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You do what you need to feel better. I, personally, can’t even look at a picture of my gone buddies until it has been years. I still find it difficult to look at pictures of my forever dog Rowdy and he has been gone almost 15 years. Some of them just hurt more than others, but loving my other buddies has definitely helped as does plain old life.
Spud has been gone about six weeks but it still feels like he is here. I know that my way of coping is keeping hyper busy, reading, and sleeping.
I hope working on projects that bring you happy memories will help you. I have Spud’s paw prints in a drawer for now. Maybe someday I can bring them out and look at them and not feel sad, but right now, I can’t. This definitely is the suckiest part of loving a fur baby.
You’ve done a wonderful job making this look like your girl! There are so many routes to healing and no right one for everyone. And of course, there will always be a scar - love leaves a mark, after all.
You did a beautiful job. I bet that was sad to work on, but it looks wonderful now.
It’s so hard to lose a fur baby. I cried over my Venkman this morning, and he passed in 2020.
My heart hurts hearing about anyone’s fur babies passing. I love the name Spud. I understand not wanting to look also.
For some reason I feel like if I take Bubby off my screen saver on my phone it means I’m not thinking about her enough or something? I think I just want to pretend that she’s still here. It hurts every day, though. I’m not sure if that’s healthy.
My DIL painted a portrait of our little backyard soldier, Loki, and bought him a Purple Heart. He was literally killed in action defending the “homestead” about a month after saving my son from a rattlesnake. He was such a character and had little dog syndrome to the nth degree! Sometimes it’s hard to look at it, because I love and miss him, but at the same time I’m so proud of him.
Healing takes time. And I agree, love leaves a mark, and it’s permanent.
It’s been a year and it hasn’t gotten easier.
